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Friday, June 21, 2013

Perks of Marrying a Virgin

Let me start off by saying, I am a virgin and PROUD of it. In fact, just so guys know my intentions, I typically introduce myself like so, "Hi, I'm Ashley and I'm a Virgin." Think I'm joking? Ask any of my friends. That being said, I also strongly believe in making fun of myself and looking at the humor in life. So sit back, grab a glass of wine and enjoy my virgin perks.

Perks of marrying a Virgin:

1. You've heard the theory that you should "test" the car before you buy it. Well, the bonus of marrying a virgin is you don't have to worry about what type of "car" you are. I have never driven a BMW or Lexus. So you could be a 1986 Kia and you're going to be a Bentley to me. 

2. Couples often tell me that sex isn't that exciting and when you're married you'll barely "do it". Let's take a look at the math... If you've been having sex since you were 17, get married at 28 by the time you're in your mid 30's you're (probably) over it. Which means, if I get married at 28 (fingers crossed!) I'll be nearly 50 by the time I'm supposed to be "over it". Future husband, you are welcome.

3. When you're dating a Virgin, you don't have to worry about pregnancy scares. How many times have you driven your friend, girlfriend, sister or a perfect stanger to CVS because someone is a little "late"? At least I can confidently tell you when my pants are a little snug it has nothing to do with me carrying your child and everything to do with eating too much FroYo. 

4. Virgins are easily swayed. When I get married I'll have (roughly) 28 years of built up... um... "feelings", so when it comes to Virgins we'll never respond with "been there, done that." I think I've elaborated enough, you know what I mean...

So that's it, four reasons to enjoy dating or marrying a virgin. Everyone gives us a hard time because we're making our beau wait BUT when it finally happens, I can gaurentee my husband will have way better lockerroom talk than yours. 


  1. Totally agree with you, and by the way love your blog!